MY FIRST DAY AT SCHOOL

So today was my First Day and it was a bit like being five years’ old again, but I’m glad to say I survived. The morning was spent being bombarded with questions (who would have thought I could be so intriguing?) from the sublime to the ridiculous, like: where do you live?; how old are you? (the cheek!); do you have a cat?; do you like Paris?; can you sing for us? (ouch!); do you have a boyfriend?; what’s your ‘phone number?! Oh, for heaven’s sake! The most embarassing bit came when I thought I was being asked “do you like a reporter?”. What a strange question, thought I, but hey, maybe these kids find current affairs intellectually stimulating and regularly read The Telegraph …. In fact, it turned out to be “do you like Harry Potter?” which, if said with a strong French accent sounds very much like ‘do you like a reporter?’ Oh, what fun we’re going to have! Then this afternoon, I had to go to the University for an afternoon of French bureaucracy, dressed up as an ‘information session', nothing of which they couldn’t have told me in an email! Pfff! And now, I’m exhausted … yawn … so good night … zzzzzzz

p.s. I don’t want to lower the tone but one thing I find most odd and a bit distressing is that there are no toilet seats in the school – why should this be? Speculations gratefully received!